Writing a Personal Statement -- Sample Outline Opening Paragraph: State your general reasons for pursuing graduate study and introduce yourself to the selection committee in a compelling manner. Make it interesting; the committee members will read many applications, so be sure yours gives them a sense of your particular talents and blogger.com Size: 59KB 7/1/ · Personal Statement Essay Example, First Draft When I was very young my parents pressured me to succeed academically, play sports, make hobbies, etc. like many parents do. I was constantly at the demand of my mom and dad’s wishes. This of course wasn’t a negative thing Personal Statement Sample Outline This outline is meant to be a guide to help you as you prepare your personal statement for scholarships in the College of Engineering. Each situation requiring a Personal Statement will have a slightly different focus so make sure you change your personal statement for
10 Personal Statement Essay Examples That Worked | CollegeVine
Your essay can be the difference between an acceptance and rejection — it allows you to stand out from the rest of applicants with similar profiles. Your personal statement is any essay that you must write for your main application, such as the Common App EssayUniversity of California Essaysor Coalition Application Essay. This type of essay focuses on your unique experiences, ideas, or beliefs that may not be discussed throughout the rest of your application.
This essay should be an opportunity for the admissions officers to get to know you better and give them a glimpse into who you really are. These personal statement essay examples were all written by real students.
For each example, we provide a first draft, what the writer can improve, and the revised version. View the complete list of personal statement examples towards the bottom of the post. Discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period of personal growth and a new understanding of yourself or others.
When I was very young my parents pressured me to succeed academically, play sports, make hobbies, etc. like many parents do. For a large part of my younger years I was missing the independence and sense of self I would develop later in life, because I was always under pressure to succeed in the form of success my parents had defined. As a child I was set up to follow my parents idea of the path to success.
However, when I was ten years old, this path was interrupted. My parents divorced when I was about three years old, and when I was ten years old my dad moved away from my home in Illinois. Most people who hear this think It was hard for me, or sad… but in reality I see it as a blessing.
To say it was without consequences and hardship would be false, but ultimately the place my family is in now has ultimately benefited from this physical separation. Once my dad moved away I was no longer pressured by him.
The influence personal statement outline example parents had on me while they were raising me together imbedded a drive in me that I will always be thankful for, personal statement outline example. However, their separation allowed me to grow independent and develop the relationship I currently have with myself. As I grew up in a single parent household, my mom had less time and ability to parent me as strictly and closely as she had once done when my father was living in Illinois as well.
This odd form of freedom forced me personal statement outline example become independent. As soon as middle school I was riding the light rail train by myself, reading maps to get myself home, applying to special school programs with no pressure personal statement outline example do so.
I rapidly developed a sense of independence. My father of course had a limited understanding of my lifestyle and who I was becoming, and my mom only wished she could be more attentive. Because of this my parents both had a limited understanding of how independent and self motivated I had become.
The event that brought my independence and self personal statement outline example, and the idea that I had reached adulthood to light, was my exchange trip to Morocco in the summer of I kept looking, and eventually found the SNYI-L program, personal statement outline example, a program with a full paying scholarship opportunity.
The application in itself was a huge process, one I had to do on my own, personal statement outline example. Applying for a passport, organizing how my parents would both sign for my passport while living in separate states, keeping track of countless forms, finding my immunization records, etc. were all small acts of independence that went unnoticed until I was notified of my position as a semi-finalist.
At this point my parents finally somewhat recognized how self motivated and independent I had become. Being accepted as a finalist was icing on the cake. The idea that I could live in a foreign country, with a family I had never met, for two months, and the effort that it took for me to reach that point, drove home the idea that I was independent, I truly was an adult.
The author has drafted a thoughtful coming-of-age story by exploring their relationship with their parents and how it influenced their own ability to independently make decisions about their interests and goals. As they imply in their essay, self-determination is a process which all children must undergo at some point—they must find who they are, what they like and believe, and what they hope to accomplish free from the influence of the pillars in their life who have largely determined that personal statement outline example them up until the point of realization, personal statement outline example.
Did they feel that they could only truly accept themselves as independent once their parents accepted it? They should also spend more time reflecting on their own realization about their adulthood and how they came to take the reigns of their own future, personal statement outline example. What did this feel like? Was there a particular moment when they realized that the work would no longer be done for them?
How did they grapple with this sudden burden of responsibility? The essay needs to focus on their own realization here, and less personal statement outline example on the process of proving their maturity to their parents. Secondly, the author should take personal statement outline example step back and think about what true independence and adulthood means to them. Though the essay focuses on this coming-of-age period in their life, they never talk specifically about what this peak achievement would mean for them personally.
Was it that they could get on a plane and go to Morocco and be alright without their parents, or was it that they had the ability to decide that they were interested in an immersive experience and that they took the necessary steps to achieve this interest? Adulthood and independence mean different things to different people and look a little bit different to each of us depending on our different situations.
Lastly, the essay could benefit from a deeper exploration of their relationship with their parents. The author talks in very broad terms about how they were raised and how their separation led to growth. Early in the essay, they mention a battle between their wishes and those of their parents. What did these conversations, either internal or external, look like?
They should show this in their writing, rather than telling it. Remember that the success of the essay depends on the ability to deeply personalize it and explore the relevant emotions and reflections associated with each step in the journey to adulthood, personal statement outline example. While their journey to adulthood personal statement outline example include their parents, this essay should center around the author and their own recognition of their personal milestones and accomplishments.
The twisting roads, ornate mosaics, and fragrant scent of freshly ground spices had been so foreign at first. Now in my fifth week of the SNYI-L summer exchange program in Morocco, I felt more comfortable in the city. It was hard to believe that only a few years earlier my mom was worried about letting me travel around my home city on my own, let alone a place that I had only lived in for a few weeks.
While I had been on a journey towards self-sufficiency and independence for a few years now, it was Morocco that pushed me to become the confident, self-reflective person that I am today. As a child, my parents pressured personal statement outline example to achieve perfect grades, personal statement outline example, master my swim strokes, personal statement outline example, and discover interesting hobbies like playing the oboe and learning to pick locks. I felt compelled to live my life according to their wishes.
Of course, this pressure was not a wholly negative factor in my life —— you might even call it support. Despite all these achievements, I felt like I had no sense of self beyond my drive for success. I had always been expected to succeed on the path they had defined. As early as middle school, I was riding the light rail train by myself, personal statement outline example, reading maps to get myself home, and applying to special academic programs without urging from my parents.
Even as I took more initiatives on my own, my parents both continued to see me as somewhat immature. All of that changed three years ago, when I applied and was accepted to the SNYI-L summer exchange program in Morocco. I would be studying Arabic and learning my way around the city of Marrakesh. Although I think personal statement outline example parents were a little surprised when I told them my news, the addition of a fully-funded scholarship convinced them to let me go, personal statement outline example.
I lived with a host family in Marrakesh personal statement outline example learned that they, too, had high expectations for me. If I messed up, they patiently corrected me but refused to let me fall into the easy pattern of speaking English just as I did at home. Just as I had when I was younger, I felt pressured and stressed about meeting their expectations.
However, one day, as I strolled through the bustling market square after successfully bargaining with one of the street vendors, I realized my mistake. I had applied for this trip, and I had committed to the intensive language study. Similarly, the pressure my parents had put on me as a child had come out of love and their hopes for me, not out of a desire to crush my individuality. As my bus drove through the still-bustling market square and past the medieval Ben-Youssef madrasa, I realized that becoming independent was a process, not an event.
Now, although I am even more self-sufficient than I was three years ago, I try to approach every experience with the expectation that it will change me. View more personal statement essay examples by signing up for a free CollegeVine account. Why is this? Most students applying to top schools will have stellar academics and extracurriculars.
Your essays are your chance to stand out and humanize your application. Before submitting your application, you should have someone else review your essays. We highly recommend giving this tool a try! Essay Guides for Each School. How to Write a Stellar Extracurricular Activity College Essay. Does your Common App essay actually stand out?
Submit or Review an Essay — for personal statement outline example Personal Statement Prompt Discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period personal statement outline example personal growth and a new understanding of yourself or others. Personal Statement Essay Example, First Draft.
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, time: 11:5510 Best Personal Statement Examples (How to Write)
6/17/ · Graduate personal statement example Similar to a school leaver personal statement, but with extra attention paid to specific things you’ve studied during higher education. Once again, try and explain why you’re applying and where you’d like to go in your career, as well as the specific skills or knowledge you can offer 3/22/ · There are different types of personal statements. They are categorized according to the purpose they serve. For example, a personal statement might be included in your CV. Like a summary section or an in-person pitch, personal statements written in 11/23/ · Great personal statements use specific examples to boost the narrative. Provide examples that demonstrate a genuine interest in the program or job, such as mentioning people who are breaking new ground in the industry, the trajectory of the field and how you intend to contribute to the body of knowledge
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